Scott's 2015 Predictions of All Kinds
MLB in 2015 AL East 1. Yankees (3) - I don't like to pick them, but every team in the AL East has its unknowns (except the Rays, they sold off all of their players and will su-uck this year). But this is the year the Yanks can make some stupid trade and buy a division title, but a pennant may be out of their reach. 2. Orioles - They had many injury issues and still won 96 games a year ago. Now, they will need Ubaldo Jimenez to become "good Ubaldo" again, but I don't think the Orioles will lose as much ground as many experts think. They have too many heavy hitters in their one through nine. 3. Blue Jays - meh 4. Red Sox - Their line-up looks good, but their pitching staff looks awful and has no leadership wha-so-ever. Jimmy Shields or Max Scherzer would have looked good! 5. Rays - They traded Ben Zobrist and others, but hey they acquired Asdrubal Cabrera, so who knows. More trades were made, and they look like they have no direction, so by default their direction is down. AL Central 1. Indians (2) - They have quite the deep rotation and a strong bullpen. They won 85 games last year with Nick Swisher and Jason Kipnis having horrible years, and Carlos Santana not realizing that the baseball season started until June 15! Tito may be the x-factor as he knows how to manage a bullpen better than anyone in the game. And he rides an awesome red scooter, as shown in bobblehead form on September 12. I think Hammy will say Ballgame! 92 times this year, plus a few more in the playoffs. Fear the Housestache! 2. Tigers (wc1) - They will be down from their high horse, which is expected with Max Scherzer taking his talents to Washington (unlike a lot of congresspeople who leave their talents at home when going to Washington). Miguel Cabrera also quietly had surgery in December and also had his worst offensive season in a half-decade last year, so his health may be an issue, as will the health of Mr. Victor Martinez. Their line-up is still darn good when he, but maybe their lack of defense and bullpen will be more of an issue. I still look for these guys to win 90 and be a wild card. 3. White Sox (1st team out) - They are vastly improved and in my opinion will just barely miss a WC berth, possibly having to face the Mariners in a tie-breaker. I have the pale hoes at 87-75. Abreu has a full year of MLB experience, plus they added Jeff Samardzija, David Robertson, Adam LaRoche and Melky Cabrera. 4. Royals (2nd team out). Brian Williams correctly said the Royals would make it to the World Series last year. Or maybe it was another team he said. He seems to have forgotten. But anyway, they will take a step bback because they really aren't that good. Eric Hosmer thuuuug. 5. Large Gap 6. Second Large Gap 7. Twins - The Twins are the only team in the entire AL that I am confident will not be in playoff contention (Therefore, congratulations in advance to the 2015 World Champion Minnesota Twins!!!!!). They made improvements in the off-season, but didn't keep pace with improvements by Cleveland and Chicago, plus they had a huge amount of room to improve from. I say they'll just barely avoid the 100 loss hey-other-hugs AL West 1. Angels (1) - Best team in the AL on paper and had the best record las year, I see no reason why it should change. 2. Mariners (wc2) - Finally have a strong team around King Felix 3. Astros - Yes, the Astros have a core group of youngin's to climb in the standings and go over .500, especially with James Springer for a whole year 4. Rangers - They had a huge amount of injuries last year, hopefully they will improve, but I really don't see much over .500 5. A's - The debacle of last season's end along with losing major pieces (salute) I think it is very possible for Oakland to win less than 70 games. But They still have enough where they could be in the hunt. AL Playoffs WC game: TIGERS over Mariners (especially if King Felix would have to be used in a tiebreaker, or late in the RS, I could see the race for that last spot be super tight) ALDS: ANGELS over Tigers, INDIANS over Yankees - due to two very strong rotations ALCS: ANGELS over Indians - Angels have a lot of firepower and its their year! Reasons are forthcoming in the League, National NL East 1. Nationals (2) - No suprise here, best team/rotation in baseball. 2. Mets (wc2) - Unlike the previous line item, this one may raise eyebrows, but the Mets have a strong young core of starting pitching including ROY Jason DeGroom and Matt Harvey, who is coming off Tommy John surgery. They could add a bat during the season, along with the man who holds said bat, but I think they will sneak in as the second WC in a weaker-than-average NL. 3. Braves - Overrated 4. Marlins - Just when you think they've turned a corner, they suck since that is also Marlinsy. But the 836 fans they average will be okay with that eha eha. 5. Phillies - I think the Fightless Phils will be the worst team in baseball. They suck and could easily lose 105 games. NL Central 1. Pirates (3) - They have been geling for a few years, and this year they go over the top 2. Cardinals (wc1) - One of the best all-around teams in baseball and the race between them and the Buccos should be a one, good. 3. Reds (2nd team out) - Good, but not that goo. I'll be nice to them since my cousin and future cousin-in-law live within a half mile of the Small Park. 4. Brewers - They're a tricky team to gather since they played well last year. But some of them are brewing PEDs in their spare time and their pitching kind of sucks. 5. Cubs - Sorry fans of Back to the Future 2, but the Cubs are too horrible to contend for the World Series. NL West 1. Dodgers (1) - Good team with strong regular season history and a weak division goes to 100+ victories 2. Padres (1st team out) - James Shields is a nice add, and the Padres do well but fall just short. 3. D-Backs - Hwy not 4. Giants - Maybe they can prove me wrong and do good in an odd year, but not that often both WS participants finish fourth the next year. 5. Rockies - No clue on what direction they are going, and what few good players they have left will be wearing pinsrtripes come July. NL Wild Card Mets over CARDINALS NLDS: NATIONALS over Pirates, Mets over DODGERS - Yeah, the Mets are this year's Royals, while the Dodgers are this year's Dodgers NLCS: NATIONALS over Mets - Mets fall just short of being this year's Royals World Series ANGELS over Nationals - Probably two of the best all-around teams, but its about time Mike Trout gets a ring eha eha Indians 2015 Record: 92-70-0-0. Thats right, no ties and no games in which teams wear identical uniforms and the winner is unknown (like that infamous 2006 WBB game between Middlefield and Barrie, where Middlefield's equipment buggy never made it through customs, but the Brios allowed them to wear spare Brios uniforms, darn that Canadian hospitality!) Standing: 1st, AL Central Playoffs: Lose ALCS to Angels 25 Man: CF Michael Bourn SS Jose Ramirez LF Michael Brantley 1B Carlos Santana C Yan Gomes RF Brandon Moss 2B Jason Kipnis DH Nick Swisher 3B Lonnie Chisenhall BC Roberto Perez (Nick- Whats His Name Perez is the BC for the Generals) BN Ryan Raburn BN Mike Aviles BN probably an extra bullpen arm, since Tito rolls that way SP Coey Kluber SP Carlos Carrasco SP Gavin Floyd SP Trevor Bauer SP T.J. House (I think his handedness will give him the nod, and he deserves it anyway) RP Kyle Crocket RP Marc Rzepczynski RP CC Lee RP Michael Roth (dark horse but I am high on 'eem) RP Zach MacAllister RP Scott Atchison RP Bryan Shaw RP Cody Allen Oscars Most likely to go to prison: Oscar Pistorious Most likely to accidently get taken to a landfill: Oscar the Grouch Best Poet: Oscar Wilde Best basketball player: Oscar Robertson Most likely to ask his wife to make him a sandwich and have an obnoxious laugh: Oscar Kokoschka As far as the Academy Awards, Brad Fini wasn't nominated for anything, so I dont have a major interest. I'm going to say Birdman wins best picture, but maybe it will go to Selma because of African American protestors 2015 Republicans Record: 50-30 Standing: 1st in the AL Central. 2-5 ahead of both Cleveland and Lexington, 10-15 over Mobile, LOL @ St. Louis a * means its a prediction, kind of like Nick's. All others are locks Rosters: SS Lee Doffbatter DH Scott Hug LF Mike Brantley RF Bryce Hoppa C Yan Gnomes CF Jeb Hedge 3B Lhonny Chisenhall 1B Cliff Notes* 2B Mike Avimore BC Sandshrew Alomar BN Duncan Donuts* (OF) BN Ben Ch (INF) BN Josh Cradles (PR) SP Rick Santorum SP Andrew Blessing SP Bud Get SP Jordan Milkman RP Alfredo Sauce RP Kyle Crockpot* RP Brick Heck RP Jakub Kachinski* RP Marc Rzepczeekski RP Charizard Sajak RP Cody Skip RP Luigi Trivisonno Note: The republicans generally carry a four-man rotation and only summon a fifth starter when they play a long stretch of days in a row. 2015 WBB AL East # New Jersey (1) - Holy Kabutops! this team looks as good as their 2013 Earth Champion team. Chansey and Davis are legit MVP candidates, while they have the best rotation this side of the Atlanntic. Their only weakness is the 'pen, but good starting and maybe a well-timed trade can separate this squad from the '04 Indians. # Providence (2nd team out) - Oh how the Propels have fallen (see below). Meanwhile, the Anchors added a huge bat in Mohammad Li # Dover - Between deflatedoor, Ray Grains' issues, Nelson Boatride's suspension, the inexplicable trade of Mohammad Li and the loss of Nelson Boatride, and a lot of turmoil, the Propels will drop in the standings, but they're still better than these next two clubs. # Miami - Like...we're gonna be late to spring training because we want to watch LeBron's decision live man... # New York. A bad team got worse with Derek Cheater's retirement. AL Central # Indianapolis (3)- I have to put myself first, and I have the best 'pen in all of WBB. Jeb Hedge is a key addition. I just need Bryce Hoppa to stay healthy for a whole season. # Cleveland (5) - Brandon Algae is a huge addition, but their co-GMs, Chris Uncletonetti and Ray Rancher, are total opposites. One likes adding good players like Algae while the other one likes to text down to the dugout during games and sign bad players like Johnny Foottall and washed up players like Dwayne Arrow. But with Gruber, Tobasco, Power, and Powerhouse, they have the best rotation this side of Hoboken. # Lexington (1st team out) - They look good, but will take a small step back from last year. Even with additions like Hofbrauhous Washington and Truckdale Jones # Mobile - They look bad, and will take a small step back from last year. They're making a big deal about Howard Tim's defense behind the plate, but that's a pretty insignificant aspect of WBB, since they have nobody who can hit or pitch, except for Drew Breeze # St. Louis - Spent the entire off-season threatening to sign Francois Veto if the Republicans signed Bill Comma-Keystone-Pipeline, and didn't make any real moves. They did add SP Lowe Gas-Prices, and are taking all the credit for that, at, even though they only got him because the Southern WBB League's Gulf Of Mexico Oil Refineries allowed him to go throughout the entire USA to seek free agency. Maybe they will get double digit wins this year? idk AL West # Alaska (2) - I think they are the best all-around team in the AL but the fact that the Kabutos have a fifth of their season against the Players and force the Nuggets into the two-seed. Attack! has a year of PWBL experience under his belt, while they added C Jimmy Saltine. Their rotation, led by Chilson, Jupiter, and Wenow, is exceptional as well. And they're chewy! # San Antonio (4) - There's something about the Something, as they have stars like Timothy Duncan, Tony Driver, Kawai Sheldon, and James Tail whip, plus Mitch Dryland returning from injury. Not to mention a solid rotation with Me Darvish and newly acquired Marsala Hoyer. They need to sure up their bullpen, however. # Albuquerque - I could go for an Albuquerque Turkey now, but its a Friday in Lent. Goomba St. James may break out to have an MVP-caliber year. # Wyoming - I would like to put them higher, but their GM has pursued work in Academia and may be spending the summer in Tallahassee and having little concern of Water Baseball operations. Although last year, he practically stole Mohammad Li from Dover, so we will have to see. # California -They lose Brandon Algae, then replace him with Richard Trentson? #NotARecipeForSuccessEhaEha NL East # Atlantic Ocean (1) - Morgan Andcoke is their fourth starter. On any other rotation except maybe NJ, he would be a 1 or 2 at worst. They are bringing back almost their entire team, and the basketball team they are based on, the Atlanta Hawks, are also really good this year with a bunch of no-names, so maybe Al Horrorford (Al Horford) and Jeff Coffeegue (Teague) will be surprise contributors to the Dancers as well, especially in the early portion of the season. Too bad the Braves suck, otherwise the Dancers could win 70 games! # Virginia Beach (5) - Still known as offense first, pitching last, the Jellyfish did add star pitcher Cam Oldton to their roster, so maybe their fortunes will change. They still have offensive firepower like Tentacruel O'Neal, Piranha Plant Alverez, Thwomp Calahan, and Dave Ford. But this won't be enough to catch up to Ocean # Tampa (1st team out) - The Legen... wait for it... Daries have a lot of their How I Met Your Mother-themed players coming back. Hopefully this won't be the year they all undo their entire careers in one hour. They also have the first overall pick in the draft, so maybe they will add Jameis Marlboro or a Marcus Mariota variant. # Boston - Tobias Keith aside, this team doesn't have much. They sometimes tend to buy some talent during the season, so I'm not sure how these guys will do. # Philadelphia - The Phillises made some questionable trades, getting rid of Nick Empties and LeSean McBashful and offered player Pretzel Kelly a coaching job with control of the roster (that part isn't public knowledge but it kind of is). Oh and Cliff Flea may never pitch again. NL Central # Pittsburgh (3) - This is the hardest division to pick since all the teams kind of suck, but I think the Accents can win 42-45 games, which recently has become uncharted waters for the NL Central. But both of the teams they are based on have been doing well lately. Ben Roethmorehotdog is another year removed from his banishment to LA and Andrew McCutcheek (was that it?) could be an MVP candidate. And they have all-star heavy hitter Marquice Bouncey. # Totemsurgh - Tough call between these guys and Youngstown, but I'll give the poles the slightest of slight edges because they added several players during the off-season like Milky Cabrera, Adam LaGrasshopper, closer Robert Davidson, and reliever Zach Lord.Plus CF Brad Fini didn't spend the off-season running in a race like he normally does, so he will be well-rested. # Youngstown - They seem pretty good, but at the same time kind of average. It depends on guys like Nick Nasty, Nate Metalman, Stu Servemaster, Scott Leftside Slammer,Wayne Makeit, and James Deadweight, who was recently reacquired from LA for some reason. But Pete Penguin is a legit ace, and could contend for the Cy Old is Youngstown does any good this year. # Barrie - In my opinion, they are based on two of the more overrated real sports teams - the Bills and Blue Jays. But the Brios overpaid for LeSean McBashful, whose best days are behind him, buy trading sensational rookie Alonzo Kiko to Philly. Guys like Jose Baucoffeesta and Sammy Ampkins can score runs via the long ball and good all-around hitting (especially since Ampkins, unlike his namesake, doesn't require a quarterback to throw him the ball). And hurting Barrie is that they acquired Matt Fortress rather than spending more money on Marsala Hoyer. # Detroit - Its tough to pick any team last (or first) in this division, ut the Democrats can always find a qay to mess themselves up. The Tiger portion of their team got worse, as Maxwell Scherzer went to (who runs Washington now? Dover?). The Lion portion also got worse with the loss of Donkey Kong Suh to the Druggies, while the Democrat portion of the team is too concerned with raising wages for team employees and raising ticket prices for their rich fans. I don't think they did a lot of off-season workouts. NL West # San Diego (2) -The class of this division, but I think Hawaii can make a run (see below). They have a strong rotation led by TheShark, Streams, and newcomer Swords. Adam Civilized is still the best player in all of MLB, and there is a chance that Nate Hug may go to the Sharkweeks on loan in June and July. Another typical year for the Sharkweeks, maybe this will be the year they win the Earth Series that's eluded them. # Hawaii (4) - They will improve from last year and push San Diego. Interestingly, all eight games between these two clubs are in August. Their rotation is always strong with guys like Tito Rocket, Twister Verlander, and newcomers T.J. Tikihut and Hawaiian Punch Huff. Their lineup and 'pen could use improvements. Josh. They were active in the offseason, bringing in RP Otto Rocket, who is good but has a big ego. They also signed 1B/DH/OF Shelley DunkTank, who I thought retired, so expect a lot of popups to second base. # Tijuana (2nd team out) - The NL has two classes of teams. San Diego, Hawaii, Ocean, and maybe VB and Tampa, then everyone else. Well, the Crossers are the best of the rest although I don't really like them. Fabio O'Yaya looks poised to have a good year though. # Drowners - I think they will do better than years past, as manager Ernesto Jimenez has righted the ship. Although his annual cornhole tournament (in an attempt to get people to say "Chicago f***" has not been helping). They do have Ray Grains and Peter Adrianson via banishment (especially since another case of domestic violence/child abuse for either of them is punishable by 10 years in a Water Baseball Prison). # Debtors - Cool city, crappy team. McPlayoffs The WBB Playoffs are now the McPlayoffs for sponsorship reasons. The PWBL entered into a sponsorship agreement with McAffee Anti-virus software AL Wild Card Cleveland over SAN ANTONIO - I like Corey Gruber and the Generals pitching staff in a single game ALDS NEW JERSEY over Cleveland (3-1) - Its a battle of pitching staffs, but NJ has the better line-up, plus the Generals may only be able to use Gruber once if he is pitching in the WC game ALASKA over Indianapolis (3-2) - Republicans can't seem to contend with Attack! and the rest of that line-up. The Republicans do have the pitching to stay in any series. But Republicans tend to do well in Alaska... ALCS Alaska over NEW JERSEY (4-3) - Should be a 7-game classico. Both teams have solid rotations and one through nines. But unless NJ can sure up its 'pen, look out for some sixth or seventh inning heroics if one of the starters has an off day! (Not super late inning heroics as Merfest, Flowers, and Mumford and Sons are all solid. Marmaduke Sons plays for AAA Athens now, but he looked good in LST. Now Nick can name one of my minor leaguers who looked good in LST). NL Wild Card HAWAII over Virginia Beach - If Cam Oldton pitches for the Jellyfish, they might have a chance, but theres three teams (obvious which ones) who are at a completely different level in the NL NLDS ATLANTIC OCEAN over Pittsburgh (3-0). I thought about being generous to the less fortunate a la Pat Sajak when someone sucks at Wheel of Fortune, and give the Accents one game but the Dancers are just too good. Hawaii over SAN DIEGO (3-1) - San Diego seems to lose earlier and earlier every year, and their rotation ain't gettin' any younger (except maybe TJ Shark-Habitat can add some youth). NLCS ATLANTIC OCEAN over Hawaii (4-1) - In a series that spans seven time zones, the Dancers have elite offense and elite pitching, while the Pineapples are only "great" in the above. Earth Series ATLANTIC OCEAN over Alaska (4-3) - The Dancers are really racking up those frequent flier miles. But I don't see anyone beating them his year. And yes I'm quite boring picking the same Earth Series and champion that occurred in 2014. Oh well. Prove me wrong WBB!